Quotes for MEN

"I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste."
-David Bissonette

"When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. "
-Sacha Guitry

"After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together. "
-Hemant Joshi

"By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. "
-Socrates

"Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them. "
-Dumas

"The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, 'What does a woman want?' "
-Sigmund Freud

"I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me. "
-Anonymous

"Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays."
-Henny Youngman

"I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years."
-Sam Kinison

"There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage."
-James Holt McGavran

"I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me, and the second one didn't."
-Patrick Murray

"Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming 1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it, 2. Whenever you're right, shut up. "
-Nash

"The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once... "
-Anonymous

"You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to. "
-Henny Youngman

"My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met. "
-Rodney Dangerfield

"A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong."
-Milton Berle

"Marriage is the only war where one sleeps with the enemy. "
-Anonymous

"A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: 'Wife wanted'. Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: 'You can have mine."
-Anonymous

"First Guy (proudly): 'My wife's an angel!' Second Guy: 'You're lucky, mine's still alive."'
-Anonymous

Accessing blocked websites using CALCULATOR

When both Domain Name & IP Address are banned, Use Calculator to Access that Website
Wuntoo has written a detailed comment on how to bypass the internet content filtering software of your school or office using just the calculator application (Start->Run. type calc.exe). This unique Mathematics based trick will probably work when websites are blocked in your institution or corporate network based on the host name or their IP address.

The trick is to convert the human readable website address that's blocked (like bebo.com) into an IP address ( 208.75.184.160) and again translate this value to a decimal address which is probably not blocked by the website filters.

Here's a step by step guide to render www.myspace. com to a decimal address:

How to Access Restricted Websites

1) get its IP address (216.178.39.74), by pinging the name (if you have a direct internet connection) or if you only have access via a web proxy then find it out by using a networking website like network-tools. com.

2) start your PC's calculator, and change it to scientific mode (using the "View" menu)

3) enter each of the four IP octets, one by one, converting them to binary (enter number and click on the "Bin" radio button)
Thus 216.178.39.74 becomes216 = 11011000178 = 1011001039 = 0010011174 = 01001010 Notice how any binary numbers less than 8 digits long have had leading zeroes added to pad them out. Reassembled into IP address order, you get 11011000.10110010. 00100111. 01001010

4) Remove the dots, so you get one huge line of binary, thus: 1101100010110010001 0011101001010

5) Copy this binary string

6) Go to your scientific calculator, and hit the "Bin" button FIRST (as you are about to enter binary), THEN paste in the binary string.

7) Click on the "Dec" button on your calculator, and you will get the converted value of 3635554122

8) Add the hypertext protocol prefix and paste into your browser's address bar: http://3635554122

Wuntoo adds: I used to be in a place that had websense, where both website names and their corresponding IP addresses were blocked. However was able to get limited access by converting the IP address to decimal, which websense (at the time) did not know about. This might have changed since, or if your school runs an old version it might still work. Note that if you surf away from the page you might hit websense blocks again unless you manually reconstruct the next address you want to get to.

Synchronize your computer TIME

Chronograph is a simple utility that synchronizes your computer’s internal clock to the atomic time. Standard internal clocks are usually very incorrect, and need frequent manual corrections. Chronograph automatically maintains correct time using atomic clock servers of the National Institute of Standards and Technology (NIST). The program is extremely helpful for every computer user. It is a must have for professionals who need correct time permanently (e.g. stock traders). Chronograph provides a high degree of accuracy – the difference between local computer time and actual time after correction will rarely exceed 0.5 seconds. This slight difference is caused by an unavoidable network transmission delay. Main features: * Manual, periodical and wait-for-connection operating modes. * High stability. Program automatically connects to another server when the current server is down. * Ease of use. After the initial setting, which takes about one minute, the programs works automatically in background and doesn’t require any user attention.


Main Window













Settings Dialogue

System Tray Menu

Advanced Hint

Download Chronograph in http://www.altrixsoft.com/download/chrono.exe